siri.

mr. t has a new friend. siri.

he said to siri, "knock knock!"

siri replied, "i don't understand what you mean by 'not tonight'."

mr. t asked siri, "who is your main squeeze?"

siri replied, "i forgot".

mr. t asked siri, "what are you wearing?"

siri replied saying aluminum casing.

mr. t asked siri, "who's your daddy?"

siri replied, "i don't know what you mean."

i just got hit with a pterodactyl.

first of all, i want to say i have no idea how to spell teradactyl. and i'm too lazy to look it up. and i also want to say that normally i believe children don't belong in public. ever.

last night i had dinner with a cousin, and it was a great time. the waiter asked how old i was. when i told him, his response was, "damn girl, you're old!" wow.

i spent the evening trying to figure out how that could be a compliment. he said its not. then he said, "you're very attractive". so, i guess that makes things okay between us.

the kid at the table behind us was playing with dinosaurs on the ledge between the booths. when i wasn't paying attention to him, he would put a dinosaur in my hair and pull. or he'd poke me in the eye with a dinosaur. it was great.