things you shouldn't do when you're drunk.

things you shouldn't do when you're drunk:

archery

breast feeding

call your boss

drive a bobcat

eat mushrooms

fart in church

go to church

have a baby

ignite things

juggle knives

kiss strangers

let your dog lick peanut butter off your butt

move furniture

night swimming

order stuff from the internet

pee on union station

quit smoking

rainbow tossing

shop

trim your taint hair

use scissors

vow to get married

wash your car

x-files marathon

yodel

zoloft

things to do when i am stressed.

my friend cletus and i made an alphabetical list of things i can do when i am stressed:

act like a maniac
buy lots of dvds

celebrate your birthday for a month
DRINK!!!

eat two chipotle burritos in one sitting
FREAK OUT!

get a tattoo
haircut

incessantly clean things
jump around.

kiss some dude at GNC  
LEAVE WORK!

meet people up at thomas
needlepoint :)

open a 20oz. of diet mountain dew
play wheelchair basketball

queef much?
RUN, bitch!

sip drinks at old chicago for 7 hours
try to get my facebook page back :)

use people in a survey
va-jay-jay cleaning

watch rap videos
x-rated videos!

yogging

zoo visiting