what happens when a piercing gets ripped out.

rules of making a sex tape.

if you decide its absolutely necessary to make a sex tape, there are a few rules that cletus and i think you MUST follow:

1. destroy it afterward.
2. if you don't destroy it immediately afterward, you need to destroy it if you break up.
3. it is not appropriate to watch it every now and then. or ever.
4. if you do break up and find a new boyfriend/girlfriend, you can not remain friends with the person with whom you made the sex tape. that's not appropriate.
5. if one party wants the tape destroyed, it needs to be destroyed. immediately.
6. if you do break up and quit speaking to each other, it is not appropriate to send a text after a few years saying "hey, we haven't talked in awhile. i still watch that tape every once in awhile."
7. just don't make a sex tape in the first place. nothing good will ever come out of it. ever. its just ammo.

why i'm awesome.

i was looking through my planner today and saw that i had written "genghis khan 1 p.m.!"

wtf??????

i don't remember writing it.

turns out, at happy hour on friday, i made plans with two friends to go to genghis khan today at 1 p.m. yikes. new rule: no writing plans in the planner while intoxicated.

yummmmmy jalapeno burger